The Stupidest Story Ever

I was walking down the street, then a chicken appeared and said "You win one million tacos!" but then I said "WTF? Chickens aren't supposed to talk!" but then I realized something. "You must be a ninja chicken!" and the chicken said "That's right, now I will use my eggjitsu to steal all your bananas!" and then a bunch of eggs came out of nowhere and splattered everywhere. I said "No one tries to steal my bananas with eggs!" so then I got in a monster truck and turned it on. The chicken then went like "Oh no! I'm allergic to monster trucks!" and sneezed then got so fat and burped. Then  a dolphin jumped out of somebody's pool a did a backflip. I got hungry so I went out to get a sandwich and decided to look for one at a store called 'Hats'. I asked the lady at the front "Where's my sandwich?" but when she turned around I realized she was my sandwich! I ate her but I still felt hungry so I ate the cash register too. Everyone got mad at me for some reason so I danced but they were still mad. I asked them "Why are you mad?" and then a little girl said "Because you stepped on my dollie!" and when I looked down I saw a paper with a drawing of a stick figure of a lady. I said "That's not a dolly! This a dolly!" then I pulled out a clay model of a girl and the girl went like "It looks like a telephone, I don't like telephones!" and then the telephone in the store said "You wanna fight?" and then the girl transformed into a macho wrestler and she said "Yes!" and the telephone turned into a sumo wrestler. The store turned into a boxing arena and I gave everyone zucchinis to eat while watching. I needed to go to the bathroom so I left. I walked into a furniture store and walked in the part with lots of bath tubs where I played golf but then the manager said "Hey! I wanna play too!" and then I said "You can't play!" so the manager said "Then get out of my store!" but then I was like "No! You get out!" I kicked him out and took over the store and I replaced all the furniture with bathtubs and renamed the store, 'The Bathroom!" I got lots of visitors but they weren't happy because they told me none of the bath tubs came with a monkey action figure. I got tired and I went to sleep, but then the sun started talking and said "You can't sleep because I'm still here!" but then I said "I wanna go to sleep!" so the sun ate me but then he said "Eww! You taste like tuesdays!" so he spit me out and I landed on top of a bear. I went home but I found out it was taken over by the evil trash cans! I said "Hamsterdudes unite!" Then I got in my Hamsterdude red costume and then Hamsterdude blue, Hamsterdude yellow, and Hamsterdude black and white showed up. I was secretly part of the Hamsterdudes, the defenders of my house! We used our super Hamsterdude techniques to kick all the trashcans to the sun! The sun said the trashcans tasted like wednesdays and he loved the taste of wednesdays so he ate them. All of a sudden my grillfriend showed up and she made me burgers and I ate them. But then the burgers said "I want my mommy!" and I giant lady burger showed up and said "It's time to die!" and she threw a dice at me and we played board games. She lost and said "Noo!" and I ate her. But when she said "Noo!" the letters materialized and they challenged me to a motorcycle race but then I said "Nah" and then they said "It's cool brah!" and they left to go get some tacos. I decided that I should drive a car so I went inside a blue car and started driving really really fast. I went so fast I flew off planet Earth and went on the moon and then I started dancing with the moonbunnies. The moonbunnies read me a newspaper about the new soap opera with realistic suds and bubbles. I said "Okay" and then the moon blew up. I went home but I found out my goldfish died and then I cried so much the whole world started flooding until planet Earth was nothing but water. I decided to only way to fix the problem was to eat everything so I ate the planet. I went to go hang out with the sun and he was like "Look what you did!" and I said "Where do I look?" and the sun pointed behind me and I saw some footprints I made. Then the sun punished me by forcing me to watch him sleep and I died of boredom. It was all the dolphin that jumped out of the pool and did a backflip's fault.